Turns out, its not as easy as I thought. Also, once you stop dancing to the narcissists manipulations, they don’t necessarily give up, they just start whining about how you don’t love them anymore, and aren’t trying to make your relationship work. In addition, once you stop freaking out when the narcissist threatens to leave you, they start trying to make YOU leave, i.e. kick you out. I quote, “you just need to leave for a couple days and then you’ll realize that I love you”. Really?! Ugh, I don’t think so. He really thinks that once I am without him I will shrivel up into a ball of neediness and come begging him to take me back.
Living with a narcissist will always be a roller coaster of emotions because they will push and pull you in many directions emotionally. Narcissists will seek out co dependent partners because they know they can keep a co dependent in their web of control and emotional withdrawal.
Whenever we have a narcissist as a client they tell us everything we are doing wrong. They do not want to talk about the issues they are having and the reason they made an appointment to see us. When we have a couple for couples counseling and one of them is a narcissist they want to blame the other person for everything wrong in the relationship. A narcissist will never take responsibility for their action. Instead, they will project their behavior onto their partner, as if their partner actually did this to them.