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Tag Archives: couples counseling

How to Communicate if You Are Angry

It’s okay to get angry in a relationship – everyone does at some point! What’s important is that you resolve conflicts in a healthy way. If you get angry with your partner, here are a few steps to take:

  • Stop. If you get really angry about something, stop, take a step back and breathe. Tell your partner you’d like to take a short break before continuing the conversation. Give yourself time to calm down by watching TV, talking to a friend, playing a video game, taking a walk, listening to some music or whatever helps you relax. Taking a break can keep the situation from getting worse.
  • Think. After you’re no longer upset, think about the situation and why you got so angry. Was it how your partner spoke or something they did? Figure out the real problem then think about how to explain your feelings.
  • Talk. Finally, talk to your partner and when you do, follow the tips above.
  • Listen. After you tell your partner how you feel, remember to stop talking and listen to what they have to say. You both deserve the opportunity to express how you feel in a safe and healthy environment.

Communicating isn’t always easy. At first, some of these tips may feel unnatural or awkward, but they will help you communicate better and build a healthy relationship.

At Affordable Counseling Center, we provide counseling services to individuals, couples, families, children, teens, and adults with any type of crises.  We help you build tools as well as help design and implement individualized goals and objectives, help you sort out beliefs, thoughts, and behavior patterns that may be hindering you in your relationship(s) whether at the work place or in other areas of your life.  

We have the tools you need for managing pain, anxiety, disappointment, frustration, hopelessness, or anger resulting from circumstances that interfere in achieving a balanced and fulfilling lifestyle.  By working together, we will show you how to set and achieve goals and objectives therapeutically designed to meet your needs that will allow you to live the life you know that you deserve.
We can be reached by phone/text/or email. We have offices in Tampa and Brandon and schedule your visits at times that are convenient to you.
Call or Text us at (813) 244-1251
                                  http://www.starpointcounselingbrandon.com
                                    http://www.starpointcounselingtampa.com
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Forgiveness: Letting Go of Grudges and Bitterness.

When someone you care about hurts you, you can hold on to anger, resentment and thoughts of revenge — or embrace forgiveness and move forward.

Nearly everyone has been hurt by the actions or words of another. These wounds can leave you with lasting feelings of anger, bitterness or even vengeance.  If you don’t practice forgiveness, you might be the one who pays most dearly. By embracing forgiveness, you can also embrace peace, hope, gratitude and joy. Consider how forgiveness can lead you down the path of physical, emotional and spiritual well-being.

 What is forgiveness?

Forgiveness is a decision to let go of resentment and thoughts of revenge. The act that hurt or offended you might always remain a part of your life, but forgiveness can lessen its grip on you and help you focus on other, more positive parts of your life. Forgiveness can even lead to feelings of understanding, empathy and compassion for the one who hurt you.

Forgiveness doesn’t mean that you deny the other person’s responsibility for hurting you, and it doesn’t minimize or justify the wrong. You can forgive the person without excusing the act. Forgiveness brings a kind of peace that helps you go on with life.

 Letting go of grudges and bitterness can make way for happiness, health and peace. Forgiveness can lead to:
  • Healthier relationships
  • Greater spiritual and psychological well-being
  • Less anxiety, stress and hostility
  • Lower blood pressure
  • Fewer symptoms of depression
  • Stronger immune system
  • Improved heart health
  • Higher self-esteem

What are the effects of holding a grudge?

  • Bring anger and bitterness into every relationship and new experience
  • Become so wrapped up in the wrong that you can’t enjoy the present
  • Become depressed or anxious
  • Feel that your life lacks meaning or purpose, or that you’re at odds with your spiritual beliefs
  • Lose valuable and enriching connectedness with others

Forgiveness is a commitment to a process of change. To begin, you might:

  • Consider the value of forgiveness and its importance in your life at a given time
  • Reflect on the facts of the situation, how you’ve reacted, and how this combination has affected your life, health and well-being
  • Actively choose to forgive the person who’s offended you, when you’re ready
  • Move away from your role as victim and release the control and power the offending person and situation have had in your life

As you let go of grudges, you’ll no longer define your life by how you’ve been hurt. You might even find compassion and understanding.

At Affordable Counseling Center, there are two convenient locations for you to choose from in Brandon and Tampa.  

We provide counseling services to individuals, couples, families, children, teens, and adults with any type of crises.  We help you build tools as well as help design and implement individualized goals and objectives, help you sort out beliefs, thoughts, and behavior patterns that may be hindering you in your relationship(s) whether at the work place or in other areas of your life.  
 
We have the tools you need for managing pain, anxiety, disappointment, frustration, hopelessness, or anger resulting from circumstances that interfere in achieving a balanced and fulfilling lifestyle.  By working together, we will show you how to set and achieve goals and objectives therapeutically designed to meet your needs that will allow you to live the life you know that you deserve.
CALL US TODAY TO SCHEDULE YOUR APPOINTMENT: 813.244.1251
http://www.affordablecounselingbrandon.com
http://www.starpointcounselingbrandon.com
http://www.starpointcounselingtampa.com

Marriage Counseling

Every relationship is bound to experience highs and lows, and that’s normal when you’re in a relationship as close as a marriage. Determining whether your marriage is experiencing a small bump in the road or if it’s something more serious that requires professional counseling may be easier than you think.

Even the best marriage can suffer normal wear and tear over the years. If it shows signs of breaking down and you and your spouse growing apart, professional marriage counseling is often the best next step. A good counselor can guide you toward getting the relationship back on the right track by identifying what the real issues are and then helping you to implement solutions.

Marriages tend to change over time, especially when faced with a major transition, such as one partner going back to school, when you’re expecting your first child, or you’re suffering the loss of a family member. A good marriage counselor can help you to get through these changes so that you can find your relationship’s new normal and regain focus on each other.

Even if you feel that your marriage is in good shape, counseling may be able to make it great. Getting the perspective of an objective professional can help you to keep your relationship with your spouse running smoothly.

We can help. Call us to schedule your marriage counseling session and begin making your relationship great again.

Email us at: starpointcenter@aol.com or call us anytime at (813) 244-1251

http://www.affordablecounselingbrandon.com

http://www.starpointcounselingtampa.com

http://www.starpointcounselingbrandon.com

Sending & receiving ~ good vibes

Believe it or not there’s a science behind “good vibes” and ways to draw them into your life. The law of attraction states, in simple terms, that the energy you put into the universe will dictate the world around you. So, in theory, if you simply think positive thoughts and send positive vibes out into the universe, your life will be better.

Think about it, how many times have you stubbed your toe getting out of bed, or spilled your coffee in the morning and had your whole day go downhill from there? It’s the law of attraction. As you stub your toe or spill your coffee, you’re sending negative energy out into the universe. After that, the universe will respond to your negative energy with more negativity.

When you have a brighter outlook on life and your future, it only makes sense that a bright future will follow.  So, be confident in what you want to ask the universe to give you; make sure you want it with your whole heart and soul. Then, visualize what you want as if it’s already yours, and imagine sending a mental picture of it out into the universe. Be confident, keep a positive state of mind and imagine that you already have it. The stronger your faith, the quicker your reward will come to you. In addition, don’t forget to be grateful; thank the universe for all of the wonderful things you’ve received in your life this far. This will increase your positive state of mind and send more good vibes out into the universe.

 

Couples Counseling

Communication skills are a great skill in any relationship. Assertive Communication is the best way to communicate versus aggressive, passive aggressive or passive  communication

Fully listen to your spouse before formulating your thoughts, you can even repeat back to them “so I think I am hearing you say……….. is this correct”. Then formulate your thoughts and then speak. A lot of times we will start formulating our thoughts before the other person is done talking and then we do not full understand what they are saying.

. When talking to your spouse speak in a non emotional calm voice and tell your spouse how you feel. Do not tell them what they are doing wrong, in your mind, blaming them in a loud or aggressive voice.

If you feel you will benefit from couples counseling in the Tampa Bay area please visit our web site affordablecounselingbrandon.com  or call us at 813-260-8892.

Are you in love or in love with the idea of love?

Often times we think we are in love, but in reality we are so caught up with the idea of love and being love that we confuse the two.

These are some signs that you are in love with the idea of love:

1. You believe your life will begin once you have the love of your life. Your life and happiness revolves around finding your significant other.

2. You’re dreaming of your wedding and the life you’ll have with someone, and you’re just looking for someone to fit into that role, not the other way around. You are fixated on what the relationship can do for you, not what you can give to it.

3. You know you don’t really love them, but you’re holding on to the love they give. You’re often times find yourself convincing yourself that you’re in love

4. You have this inclination to want to change your partner or drag things out when you know it’s not going to work out in the long-run.

5. You’re never single for too long. You don’t take the necessarily time to heal after a failed relationship. You just jump from one to the next.

6. You can’t seem to take it slow, even when you try to. All of a sudden you become obsessed with the other person, you’re around them all the time, you are literally addicted to the feeling of being with them.

Communication Skills

Proper communication starts with fully listening and understanding what the other person is saying to you before you formulate your thoughts and speak. When talking to someone, tell them what you want to say without yelling or getting upset. Do not verbally attack the other person, talk in a calm tone and stick to one subject. If you would like a Therapist help you and your spouse with communication skills please call Star Point Counseling Center at 813-244-1251 to set an appointment.

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